Is This Home?

Hi Everyone!

Sorry it's been a while... I've been going, going, going since I've been back! But now I've found a little bit of time to write, so I'll fill you all in on what life's been like back here in the States!

First though, I want to say thank you. Through all of your prayers, support, encouragement, and love I made it through internship! It would not have been possible without you, please know that in your heart of hearts, I am truly thankful for all that you have done to help me get to France! Lives were touched, friendships were made, and I have been forever changed. So thank you, from the very depths of my heart, thank you for answering the call to be part of my team.

Well, it's been a little over a month since I've been back. And it's surreal. After a lot of running around during break (New York, Florida, North Carolina, Illinois, and finally Minnesota to return for my senior semester) I've been able to actually sit down and begin processing. It has not been easy. For a while there I couldn't even talk about France because I just wanted to cry. I missed it. I still do. I built a life there, made friends, learned a language, loved, laughed, cried, lived. And now, I'm back here, in a place that was once familiar, but seems so foreign to me now. The food tastes funny, everyone speaks English, and I'm supposed to just pick back up where I left off? No. This is a time for readjustment, this is a time to reflect back, close one chapter, and move forward with the next.

This is one thing I'm so thankful for here at Bethany, during senior semester, everyone on staff is so gentle with you! They know, they understand, and they don't push you too much. I love it! I feel like I have a safe place, with plenty of people to talk to, who understand what I'm going through. I can be open, honest, and just vent if I have to. This is very much needed during reentry, it is a fragile time in a person's life, and it is important to treat them with the respect and understanding they need.

As I reflect back to my time in France I can see all of the amazing, awesome things God did. He gave me a friendship that I will always cherish, He gave me a family in Marseille, He gave me direction, and a love that I will never lose. During my time in France my heart for Europeans has grown exponentially. I am in love with Europe. Not just because of the beautiful scenery, the languages, the accents, but because God has such a deep, deep love for the people there, and He has shared this love with me. I know that He has such wonderful plans for the people there. I also know the darkness, the hopeless oppression that the live under, and I desperately just want to love the people there. I want to be used by God to shine the light of His love in these dark places. It makes me sad to see how so many people in the church remain ignorant of the need there. It genuinely hurts my heart. I know now though, God has not forgotten them, He has not abandoned them, and He continues to send people like me to them, to remind them of, to show them Jesus. I am so excited for my future, and all of the wonderful things God has in store for me and Europe!

So that's just a little glimpse into my life back in the States. I miss France, I'm glad to be back though, and I'm excited for this summer when I can share with you all in person! Sending you lots of love from the frozen tundra (aka Minnesota)!

Blessings and Love,

Chrissy

Growing Pains...

Group Photo at the retreat!

Hello all! I hope you have all been blessed in this first month of the new year! Just an update on how January has been for me, and What things are going to look like as I head into a bit of a transitional phase.

The beginning of this month was spent on a retreat in a small town a bit north of Marseille with Evolution 13 staff and ministry workers. It was a wonderful time of direction and planning for all of us, and to just do life together. I really enjoyed the time of prayer, worship, and encouragement that we had with each other. It has definitely made me excited about starting ministry!

Poker night on the retreat (just chips, no money of course!)
Ladies against Gents. Notice, the Ladies won. ;)

Which brings me to the title of this week's blog. It's hard just waiting to start ministry. Of course waiting is necessary as I am still learning and trying to grasp the language. It's funny because before I left, waiting and patience was what the Lord was teaching me, and of course I'm not through learning that lesson yet (not that I ever will be necessarily!)! Now I am learning to wait in jumping into ministry. There's so much I want to do, so many I want to encourage, but I can't.... because my language skills just aren't there yet. And for those of you who haven't tried learning a language in another culture let me paint you a little picture: You are an intelligent adult, who is fully capable of forming sentences, thoughts, and having conversations. Now, you are treated like a child, who can't speak, who can't communicate, and have to ask everyone to slow down when they talk to you because you just can't keep up. It's very frustrating. But in that frustration, there is so much learning! It's amazing to me how much God is teaching me through all of this! In my time here I can feel as I continue learning the language, I am also growing closer to Him. This is probably because I am continuously running to Him through my frustrations and difficulties here. But don't get me wrong! I have my moments where I choose to just let frustration turn to anger, throw up my hands, and desperately want to scream. I'm human after all, I'm not perfect! But I know that God has had so much grace for me in this time. I see it when I can understand so much more in French than I could when I got here, or when I actually try to speak in French, and I can do it! It's all a matter of pushing past the barriers, praying for peace (cause it is NERVE WRACKING to try to talk to people in their native language when it isn't your native language!) and grace, and just DOING it! It is a challenge, it isn't like poof! now you speak another language. It's work, and it's hard, but it is incredibly rewarding, especially when in the end, it brings glory to God!

So here is my challenge to you: how is God asking you to step out of your comfort zone? What has He asked you to do that seems completely terrifying to you, so much so that it's crippling? I challenge you to ask Him for peace, for grace, and then DO IT! I know it's hard, and it's scary, and sometimes it's very painful, but guess what? You will grow so much! In the Lord, no matter what age we are, we are always growing in Him. Our walk with Him is not promised to be easy, but count it all joy, because your faith in Him will grow exponentially! Remember in the end it's all about love. Love Him, and through that you will be able to love others, which includes doing the hard stuff! There's a reason they're called growing pains, but oh man, the end result is something so beautiful!

So in conclusion: Take a leap of faith! It might be tough, painful even, but in the end, the reward far outweighs any temporary discomfort. Please continue keeping our team in prayer, and remember that you are loved! God has a lot in store, for me, and for you. Always remember that.

Blessings and Love,

Chrissy

Remember Who You Are...

Hello all! Well I keep on trekking through fundraising! I'm close to 40% now which is GREAT! But I'm still needing some more funds, majorly in my monthly giving. To give you a better picture of where I'm at, in my one time giving I still need about $7,500; in my monthly I still need $1,400 in monthly pledges. So, if you're reading this, and thinking that you would like to give, please feel free to contact me, or go ahead and check out the "Ways to Give" tab up at the top of this page! I'm really excited to be closer to my goal, and I pray that someone who reads this will be able to bring me even closer! To all those that have already supported, THANK YOU! You have done so much for me in giving towards my internship!

So this past week I watched The Lion King, one of my all time FAVORITE Disney movies! I love that movie a lot. One of my favorite parts of the movie is when Simba sees his father, Mufasa in the clouds, and Mufasa says to him: "Simba you have forgotten me." Simba replies: "No, how could I?" then Mufasa tells him: "You have forgotten who you are and so have forgotten me. Look inside yourself, Simba you are more than what you have become..." so Simba asks: "How can I go back?" and Mufasa tells him: "Remember who you are. You are my son, and the one true king. Remember...who you are.... Remember." and Mufasa fades out. Well if you've seen the Lion King, you know that Simba does go back, to challenge his uncle, and take his place as king of Pride Rock. You also know that it took the urging of his lady lion, Nala, AND the strange, albeit wise shenanigans of Rafiki and finally this interaction with his father's ghost to get him to return.


I always tear up during this scene, because it reminds me so much of our interactions with our heavenly Father. So often we veer off the path he has set us on because we are afraid of letting past decisions, and the fear of others to stop us. Simba felt he couldn't go back because Scar had convinced him it was his fault that Mufasa had died, and Simba feared that all the other lions in the pride would feel the same, that if it hadn't been for Simba, Mufasa would still be alive. I know I have this problem more often than I care to admit. I know that sometimes I'm afraid to walk out in the calling on my life because of my past, and what others will think of me. But God reminds me, in the same way Mufasa reminded Simba, to remember who I am. I am his daughter, and a princess. I am royalty. I should not be afraid to do what He tells me to, I should not fear the outcome of different situations, because I am a daughter of the King, and this King is ruler over ALL things! He KNOWS what will happen when I step out and walk out in the calling over my life, to follow the destiny that has been prepared for me.

So you need to remember this. Remember who you are. Do not ignore your calling, your destiny  because you are afraid of the shadows of your past. God has forgiven you all of your sins, and you are spotless and new. You have a calling on your life, and it is time. Time to answer the call, to follow God's leading, and walk down the road you were destined to walk. It may be dark, and perilous, the night is dark and full of terror, but guess what? The King of Kings, the Lord of Lords, is walking beside you! He will not let you fall, He will guide you through the valley of the shadow of death, and you will not fear, because He is with you. So jump, and trust that He will catch you. Go back, challenge the devil for the land he has taken, and take your rightful place of royalty.


“Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets."

Matthew 7:9-11


Love and Blessings,

Chrissy

The Night is Dark and Full of Terrors....

Shout out to my Game of Thrones fans! Okay so now that I've got your attention with my oh so catchy title, which I will go into later, first thing is first: logistical stuff! I have about 32% of my full budget raised for my internship! Yay! But clearly, I still have a little ways to go... SO that being said, I need to have 90% of my budget by the end of the month, if you were planning to help me out financially: THIS IS IT! Now is the time! See that little tab up there that says "Ways to Give"? Click on it, it'll give you all the info you need to easily go online, fill out a form, and help me get to France! If you are wanting to know more about my finances, there is an info tab called "My Budget" so check that one out as well, and if you want more of a breakdown of my budget, feel free to e-mail me, and I'll send you a spreadsheet. And if you're new here, first of all WELCOME! Second, check out the "Internship" and "Why France?" tabs! You can get the lowdown on what I'm talking about, and what I'll be doing as a missionary intern in France!

 Okay, so about that title. It's a line from Game of Thrones (I watch the show, about to start the books. I'm a pretty big fan.... which you know well if we're friends on facebook or you follow me on pinterest....). But I think it's kind of a true statement in a sense. Often times the dark offers fear, we hear things that may, or may not be the house creaking, but let's examine why it is the night is full of terror (because, well the darkness is kind of obvious...). It's because one of our senses is taken away. We cannot see. Not being able to see, well it's pretty scary if you weren't born without sight! Suddenly our other senses are heightened, and we can hear things that can sound pretty terrifying, we can feel things crawling on our arms... It can be pretty scary! Even if we are safely tucked in our beds,  have five bolt locks on our doors, with a five star crazy awesome alarm system, two dogs, a cat, and weapons beside the bed. We could be totally safe in every way, but take away our sight, and we can start to panic. Well, obviously I have a deeper spiritual point to this, and it's this: blindly following God is just as scary! Sometimes, God will ask us to do things that scare us because we are stepping out into the unknown! Take Moses for instance: God asked him to go to Egypt to tell Pharaoh to release the Israelites. Moses, who was happily married and tending sheep out in the desert, came up with every excuse why he couldn't do it. Can you blame him? God was asking him to go back to the place where he was wanted for murder, talk to the most powerful man in the WORLD at the time, and TELL him to let God's people go. A people who probably weren't his biggest fans considering he had been raised by the very people that had enslaved them and ordered the death of their young sons.Oh, and on top of all that, he was hearing all of this from a burning bush. But God, quite forcefully reminded him, He was God. He created man, He was in charge of the universe, and He was calling Him to this purpose. He knew how it would end, and it was Moses that He wanted, not Aaron, not some other Israelite, but MOSES. How could Moses not obey? But could you imagine how terrified he must have been? Even when God had shown Him His power, Moses could not foresee Pharaoh's reaction, he had to trust that God knew what Pharaoh's reaction would be. He had to trust that God would work everything out.

Well, while I am not about to go tell Pharaoh to let God's people go, God has called me. He has called me to take the gospel to Marseille. So I'm stepping out in faith, in the belief that even though things look unlikely, He WILL provide the finances. It's scary. It's unnerving. But it's exciting! Because now I get to see God work in miraculous ways! And I cannot wait to see what He does, not just for me, but for all of the interns going out this fall! Trusting God is scary, because our sight is taken from us, but realizing that the One that is guiding us knows everything that will happen, that He loves us more than we know, and that He will guide us to what is best for us, well it's like shining a night light in that dark room. We can't see everything, but we can see Him, and we know that He will keep us safe.

I leave you with this: "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your path straight." Proverbs 3:5-6  

It is a Truth Universally Acknowledged....

That all things worth having are not always easy to get. Fundraising is HARD! It's a daily struggle to remember that God is in control, and that He has called me to this moment, and to this life. Staying positive is a battle that I have to fight, and sometimes, I feel as thought I'm fighting a losing battle. I say all this because I feel I have to be honest, things are not always rainbows and butterflies. But I will say this: I am happy every day. God sends someone every day to encourage me, or to share Him with. He reminds me that I am not abandoned, that I am not alone, and that He is and AWESOME God. He can do anything. Even give me all of the money I need to go on internship.

So in remembering this, I remember you. My readers. And if you are out there, reading this, struggling, worrying, and scared, remember every day, God is on your side. He will never leave of forsake you. I know,  believe me, I know, it's easy to say that when you aren't feeling worried. Well I'm saying it, and I just spent the past paragraph spilling my guts about how I have been feeling the same way. But even more important than that, GOD said it to you. In His word. He is the most reliable source of truth that we have, because He is the truth. So when you begin to worry, stop. Close your eyes (Unless of course you're driving.), take a deep breath, talk to God, tell him how you're feeling, and then listen. Hear Him, because He will speak. He will comfort you, and remind you of the promises He has made.

So all this to say, I'm afraid, because the Lord has asked me to step out into the unknown. But I am fighting the fear, with the help of the Holy Spirit, the word of God, and sheer will because of my knowledge of the faithfulness of God. I will leave you with the verse that has so encouraged me: "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6

Blessings and Love,

Chrissy

Friends, Surgeries, and Fear....

Hello all!

Well it's been a little while, mostly because of a very hectic, crazy schedule! The beginning of June has come and gone, and decisions are being made, about how to proceed. This post will probably have a ton of prayer requests in it, so stay tuned for those, as well as other fun little tidbits about life these past few months.

Where to start? Well, Caitlyn came to visit. Let's start there. Caitlyn is one of my dearest, closest friends from school. She is bright, bubbly, fun, and loud! I love this girl! She came all the way from West Virginia to stay for almost a week, to relax, vacation, and see the beach. She also came at a wonderful time, since there were other things going on here at home.

1.) Surgery. Mom was having surgery on her intestines to remove a cyst. The biopsy results have not come back yet, so stay tuned for those, as well. Also please pray for continual healing, and that everything would come back fine. The surgery went very well though, and they didn't have to do an invasive surgery which was a favorably answered prayer! Thank you God!

2.) Fear. I have to admit, on the fundraising front, I am not doing as swimmingly as I'd hoped. Money is coming in. And thank a thousand times to all whom have provided said money! It is more encouraging than you know to see a few dollars here and there being donated! But, this brings me to prayer request two, please pray about finances, as well as divine appointments for me, so that all the funds will be raised in time for me to a. get my visa. and b. GO! It is very discouraging sometimes to hit these roadblocks where you feel like you are constantly questioning if you're headed in the right direction. So also pray for guidance, wisdom, and words from the Lord for me, about these things.

All this to say, that despite everything going on in my life, it was a joy having Caitlyn here! She made my day brighter, and definitely made my whole family laugh on more than one occasion! She was an encouragement to me, and to my mom. I love her a lot, and I'm super thankful that I got to have her here!

Now, to all my Port Saint Lucie followers, I will be doing a dinner for fundraising soon, so stay tuned for that as well! The details will be on facebook, so check those out soon! If you like to donate, click the link below.

https://www.youcaring.com/mission-trip-fundraiser/chrissy-s-marseille-missionary-internship/63019

Thank you all for all your support, and interest in my endeavors! Catch you later!

Love and Blessings,

Chrissy

Caitlyn and I

 at the St. Lucie River